Narcissists, Control, Money and Financial Abuse

The Finance Therapist

In the title of this blog, I pretty much summed up the answer as well as the problem.

Narcissists love money because they feel it gives them control; they especially like your money or your lack of money so that they can more easily control, and they are big on financial abuse.

Narcissists are manipulating heathens but they are not stupid. They prep and prime you to be their victim.

Here are some ways that they do this:

  • They will love bomb you (give you over the top compliments to gain your trust and adoration, after all, you can’t dislike someone who is being so agreeable and stroking your ego that much, right?) and they will give you a myriad of gifts.
  • They will flaunt and show off. Why? Because it makes them look like big shots and they need to pump their own ego even if it is superficially done.
  • They will destroy or eliminate things you own and love, especially if that thing gives you freedom. Like your vehicle.
  • They will steal, cheat, borrow, and beg from you, your family, friends, and so on… it might not be obvious. They might simply like to complain and you might simply be “helping” them… it’s often not so obvious until it snowballs.
  • They will also have hidden bank accounts.
  • They might have a bank account in your name but guess what – you might not have easy access to it.
  • They max out credit cards in a blink, without a care.
  • They max out YOUR credit cards and will “pay you back”.
  • They tend to have horrible credit scores.
  • They tend to drag your credit score down.
  • They feel entitled; they have no intention of paying any debts, including credit cards.
  • They see any creditor as someone who “makes enough money already” and often claims that anyone who expects to be paid is sneaky or greedy.
  • They don’t budget but are quick to tell you. how you don’t spend your own money correctly (because you don’t know what they do with their money but they know where every penny of your money is going)
  • They don’t like you earning money or bettering yourself.

THAT BEING SAID… there are also narcissists who are very rich, powerful and put on all the airs of being generous to you and others. Financial abuse isn’t cut and dry. However, you know when you are feeling “off” around someone and you know the feeling of money being dangled over your head.

While this is just a short blog, my youtube channel has expanded videos on the topic. www.youtube.com/michelepaiva and of course, join The Ugly Cry Society where we wipe the tears away and enjoy our healing and celebrate the future – with a few book and movie groups that do help us cathartically shed the tears!

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